Thursday, 18 September 2014

When Somebody Closes a Door ... Another One Opens a Window.

This was a line I heard from the Sound of Music, and it has walked with me through all the stages of my life. At the time I first heard it, I obviously did not know the meaning... I was a kid just falling in love with Julie Andrews ... who wasn't. 

However now it carries... so much more meaning. Now I see it as a window to understand change. I see it is an opportunity to believe that something better is coming. It is the keyhole to a positive outlook. It means that life will go on, no matter what, (even if at the time, every bone in your body believed it has just ended). 

So my life has changed .... and it has taken me a long time to get to this point. It took all this time for me to face change and accept it... and see it as a window for better things ... and in a way it has become much better. 

So I start by sharing that I went through some emotional changes ... Not going into details because I am no longer dwelling on it ... but it did not mean what I experienced did not hurt. I hurt like a beeeeep!!! It knocked the wind out of me and left me feeling very hollow inside. In fact I did not know if I would ever be the same ... and in a way I wasn't. But this was what changed the wind in my sail and completely turned me in a new direction. 

I am now sailing in new seas. I am now experiencing new passions, loves and accomplishes I never thought possible. I am happy. 

Don't get me wrong ... I think I did go a little crazy for a while, and all my purposes in life became a little blurry. It was a hard year and I struggled to find my footing... but there was always a silver lining. My Family, Faith and Friends really pulled me through... Thank God. 

I did not want to change for the bad... but a part of me thought it would be sooo easy to go down that road. After all I was the victim ... I did not ask for this change ... why should I care what anyone thought ... but I did care. 

So another ... better window opened ...

I am a Mother of two beautiful children who I love dearly. 

I am a Teacher who enjoy working with kids and believe I have the heart and and patience to make a difference.

I am a Wife... ammmm ... am I really? I will answer that question with ... I am me ... accept me for who I am ... love the good and the bad, understand all my quirks and .... be with me (not because you NEED TO but because you WANT TO).

FINALLY...

I am a Writer - I write ... I love to write ... and I love what writing does for me. And very soon I will be achieving one of my greatest dreams ... I will become a published author. 

My Children's Novel "Dragon Boyz" is going to be published... I wrote this but the joy and excitement that is attached to that comment has me wanting to scream from the highest mountain!!! It is an out of body experience and a surreal experience all at the same time. And you know what ... no one can take that away from me!! This was my journey ... my passion .. my dream to achieve ... and I did it.

So today I smile at that closed door and feel free. Today I learn something else about myself when I think about what it means that 'Another One Opens a Window'. 

Today I can climb through another window with anticipation that everything will be fine. 

I wait ... I breath ... and I welcome ....

Sincerely 

Jillian Nicole Carreira





Thursday, 13 June 2013

Not a Virtue pick... but it touches on a few that I think are important.


As a teacher who are constantly dealing with little ones it is important to smile and promote these virtues.

I think this is definitely something for the classroom and home.


Friday, 7 June 2013

The Little Princess in my Life


Her smile means so much to me and her arms are always open to hold me. She is always forgiving and accepts me for who I am.

My princess Sydney.

Thursday, 6 June 2013

Virtues Pick ... Devotion.

Funny enough when I got this virtue pick it touch a very sensitive area. I am devoted to my kids and my husband and I will try my hardest to keep the family unit together, so this virtue is very fitting.

Commitment is a very strong word that most people try to honor but few really understand the meaning of it. To me commitment means being there body, soul and heart for someone. It means facing challenges and working through them to keep the commitment going or even make it stronger. This is what it means... what I feel but sometimes I struggle to do this.

For my kids, I sometimes get aggravated easily and though I spend most of my free time with them, do feel my patience running thin. With this virtue I really need to 'discern the purpose to which life call me' and be a more loving, caring and patient mother.

For my husband, I tend to let my mind and my insecurities waver my devotion. I know my love for him is true, I know we have come far in this life's journey together, but sometimes I fear we are more far apart from where we started together. I do not want to feel this way and I struggle to understand our relationship since life and kids have changed us. With this virtue I really need to remember why we fell in love and 'keep faith with my commitment'.

I do sometimes think my life is a battlefield. When I think I have just gotten past one hurdle, another one comes at me head on. So with this virtue I have to daily remember what I hold dear and devote myself to preserving the people and the relationships I have around me.

Food for thought...

Tuesday, 28 May 2013

The Power of Prayer

It is amazing how life can really take over and sometimes you really lose yourself.

It is amazing how sometimes you take a look in the mirror and you wonder, "Who am I?"

It is amazing how the demands of life forces you to forget your own dreams and goals and put other things ahead.

I love my children but they do demand most of my time.

I love my husband but sometimes I find myself feeling very alone.

I love my job but sometimes I do wish I had a few days to myself.

I know many of you have felt the same way and struggle to keep your head afloat in the Sea of Demands. I sometimes find myself swallowing and sinking into this depression and feeling sorry for myself, but when this happens I turn to one thing prayer.

It is amazing how prayer can feed the soul and lift your spirit. Prayer can make things feel lighter and give you hope. Prayer was exactly what I needed to feel better about myself.

It was and is prayer that is getting me through tough times. They do not give you answers, but they give you the strength to hold on.

I believe in prayer... it is what saves me sometimes.