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Mom Vs Me

Sometimes I wonder if anyone sees me and actually see me. The funniest thing is most mornings I find myself picking up a torn piece of a teabag wrapping that my husband leaves nightly... and today when doing it ... I cracked up.

I do not think we have trash fairies sneaking around at night picking up the rubbish he and my kids throw around... I do not think we have magical mops and brooms floating around keeping the place clean... Yet constantly I find myself picking up after the other people in my life and I wonder if they really see me.

"What do you think my purpose in your life?"

"Am I suppose to repeatedly pick up abandoned cups and dirty wears, snack wrappings and food ends?"

"Is my job just to take after all of you?"

The problem is ... I can see myself vanishing the more I see myself hustling around doing house chores, taking care of the kids, cooking meals and being the 'dutiful' wife :)
So what do I do?!!!

What I need is for me to reach some balance for myself, and some acceptance that my family presently relies on me for everything. It makes no sense nagging and not getting anything done, so I have to do a ME BUCKET LIST.

  1. Post signs for those who can read and understand. Eg ... Wash your wears, Put dirty clothes in laundry basket. 
  2. Have a eat out night on the week where I do not have to cook food daily.
  3. Get fit with a workout and diet plan.
  4. Date night with the hubby. (at least then I would not mind picking up the teabag off the floor.
  5. Family get away to look forward to. 
Then maybe I can find me again. 





  1. You got it, Jillian. That bit about picking up and being invisible...yes, ma'am. And I sympathize with your 'me' list, too, but can't help but think about Jesus washing His friends' feet, even the one he knew was about to have him killed...sigh.

  2. I can totally see where you are coming from. Being a mom has its rewards but sometimes others don't see how much we really do!

  3. I want a magical mop! Love the ME bucket list!

  4. I know exactly what you are talking about! I constantly tell my kids that they must think I live for picking up their stuff. It definitely sometimes feels like a thankless job, but still the best job to me. I love your bucket list!

  5. I think those post hits the hearts of ALL of us moms out there! I sometimes need to step back and make time for ME as well. I am glad you are putting it out there! Thanks for sharing!

  6. A mom's job is never done! Date nights are very important too!

  7. I think it's really the same in all homes. The old man isn't too...bad but oh the kids. I can go to bed with the kitchen and the down stairs clean and wake up to find all sort of rumaging. We refer to them as the know those little creatures that come out take a bite out of everything and leave droppings everywhere they go.

    Congrats if you can win this war.

  8. Hi, Jillian. I'm following now and look forward to your posts! I can relate with you on constantly picking up trash and things left around the house by my husband and kids! I wish I had a cleaning fairy and a babysitter more often to enjoy nights out with my husband! Have a great week!

  9. Jillian,
    I struggle with the same monotony of cooking, cleaning and washing.
    Although, I changed my way of looking at things by asking my 2 year old "Does Mommy work? What does Mommy do?"
    His reply, "You take care of us."
    See, even a 2 year old recognizes the importance of having a mom who cares for her family.
    He doesn't care about my Master's degree, Emmy award or how many times I've been on the news.
    He just wants to be taken care of...

  10. I always tell my kids that I am their mother, not their maid. I refuse to clean up behind any of them when it's something that they just left lying around out of laziness. My husband grew up with a mother that cleaned his room and did his homework, and it has been a tough road with him, because he literally does not know how to take care of himself. It's frustrating as his wife, and I vow not to raise my kids the same way, lol. It's good for them to be responsible and understand that they must be accountable for their actions. And once you sit down and explain about all that you do to pick up the slack, and that it just isn't right, they usually understand and try a bit harder.

  11. I hear ya. I often go through this cycle. I get better at not doing everything for everyone but then I fall into the same old traps again.

    Last night i went and had a massage, I cant afford that all the time but it was so nice to leave son and dad at home to eat dinner and take care of themselves for an hour.

  12. totally agree! and it's definitely the little things that we do that go unnotice, like, mop or pickup the room after everyone is gone. I some times have days where I'm in no mood to clean, but when those days happen the following days are doubled with the work load. The hubby has been doing loads of clothes for me so I don't have much to do, that's a start, right?! ;)

  13. what a great post!!! and so agree, even though I'm not a mom I can relate. Thanks so much for linking up!

    Helene in Between

  14. Love your bucket list. Date nights are soo important to keeping the relationship going and for a night off from cooking, lol. Thank you for sharing and linking up to the Empowered Living hop, hope to see you back again.

  15. I can so relate with this blog post, sometimes I feel like I'm on "auto pilot" and can never switch off and it's never ending, as soon as you have tidied up, done a pile of laundry and what not, you turn around and then you find more! I love your bucket list, I would happily do one too but in all fairness I know for a fact I wouldn't follow it as I'd be too busy being a cleaning fairy!


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